Why adults have affairs?
Speak about a loaded subject that no one wants to talk about, this is it. Amusing thing, affairs have been going on from old ages. Extramarital affairs can be fraught with evils, cause heartache, and other problems. In addition you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety matter, money, age difference, religious background, remorse, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, discteet married dating.
Why do married people have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are man seeking woman for affair. I think typically though it is only the human nature, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and appreciated. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Biologically we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and exciting, and sex makes us escape the real world for a brief period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Somebody can turn the desire on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another individual, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos the world has erected against extramarital affairs. For many individuals the yearnings will defeat their doubts and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but society as well. So why, what is the means?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is terribly pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not wound your relatives or anyone else? You will need to lessen the danger you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is advantageous to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the largest cluster, huge truly. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, but they feel happy in the manner they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to think about. Your money are so knotted. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to be together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex act, at least not with their othere half. An affair sometimes solves the problem while keeping the marriage whole.
Neglect, sadly this is a frequent groung I fear. One or the other, generally the gentleman is sexually neglecting his female for a tones of reasons. As a male I actually am grateful to you guys neglecting your girls and making them obtainable to us males of romance, making them “lonely wives” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, maybe compassion is not here, could be it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Maybe we have just grown apart, our general concerns diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposite of what you want. Could be I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The first reason people give is, they look for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for economic gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair